Sunday, July 19, 2009

NIP 1

“wh…wh…” Why, why me? Me. Me. Me? This can’t be me. It is so dark. The tumultuous thunder rattles my bones. I feel the slimy, thick mud cramming up my nostrils as my head scrapes across the ground. I feel my hair being tugged to the rhythm of his quick vicious steps. My legs dangle lifeless behind. Where is he dragging me…where am I? What can’t I break free? Why can’t I at least try? The sky is on fire with ferocious lightning. It’s merely a strobe light in my shell of a mind. All I can do is shutter with fear. I suffer the hammering of the downpour…each drop a thorn in my skin. I was stripped of my clothing, my dignity, my flesh. Please make this stop. “puh…” End the torture. “Accck. Accck!” My breath. I cannot breathe. The mud fills my throat. I beg God for strength. I violently flail. My body coils. Keep twisting. Fight! Fight. I am drowning in the earth. Oh my god, I am suffocating. I cannot let him do this to me. Where is he taking me? Let go of my hair! He does. My head bounces on the sopping terrain. “AAAAAHHH! No, don’t…not me…puh...” I shiver as I sense him turn in my direction. Like a pendulum, my head swings on my neck from the strike of his foot. My face is dented in! I must feel my face. I must put my hands over my face. Protection. Where are my hands? I am so disoriented. Open eyes. Open eyes. Oh no, my hair is being wrapped around my neck. “No.” I whimper. I succumb to the burn of choking, my eyes are swelling. Open them! Break free. I need my hands. His foot is thrust on my back…need hands…now! OPEN EYES! Just as the lightning strikes bright white radiance through the sky my eyes burst open. Who is doing this to me? Again, the thunder roars and the night illuminates. I feel everything inside me go numb as I collapse to the ground…he is carrying my arms.

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“Sari, Sari! Honey, wake up! You’re having a nightmare.” My eyes flip open and freeze. In the darkness, I cautiously scan the area until I accept the comfort of my surroundings. I draw in the familiar air of our bedroom and slowly exhale my morning breath directly in Mark’s face. Mark, my wonderful, bare-chested, strong shouldered fiancé is compassionately hovering over me. My knight in shining armor shook me awake to rescue me from that horrible nightmare. I begin to sob hysterically.

“Mark.” I cannot articulate my thoughts. “Mark.” Is all I can muster between gulps of air and tears. I lean forward and enfold my clammy body into his for security.

“I got you baby. I got you. Shhhh. Shhh.” Mark squeezes me so tightly I feel we might melt into each other. The touch of his skin assures me mine is my own. “That’s it baby…relax. You’re okay. I’m gonna hold you back asleep.”
To be continued Wednesday night...

1 comment:

  1. I did not know you even had a dark side in you! Great start! Looking forward to reading more!

    ReplyDelete